If you’ve known me for any length of time you’ll know my stomach is a huge pain in the arse (or stomach, whatever). Since going on a course of antibiotics from hell for an H.Pylori infection and losing too much weight I’ve just about managed to get myself back on track with natural remedies (mastic gum, probiotics, nettle tea and slippery elm).

There’s one thing I’m not back on track with though, and that’s my weight. It’s become something of an obsession lately and not in the usual female way. I’m desperate to gain a stone so that my clothes fit again and I can lie comfortably in bed. Waking up on my front means sore hipbones and then getting up to find all my clothes look wrong. Well, until yesterday when I bought the pair of jeans I’ve been searching out for the past 3 weeks (thank you, Dotty P).

The cake I made for boyfriend's birthday, but couldn't eat (Yes, Skoda, I know. My boy does love his car)

So at the moment I spend a bit of time each day counting how many calories I eat (using this website). I aim for about 2200 per day but usually end up with about 1900. I’m drinking Complan milkshakes in the evening to round up meal-count per day to 4. This diet probably sounds like heaven to some, but I can’t eat wheat so finding fatty stuff is difficult. No cakes, doughnuts, biscuits, toasties etc. The fact I adore fruit and veg doesn’t help either. I’m starting to feel guilty about eating a bowl of blueberries. I’m not underweight (according to Carly’s Wii fit), but having been a stone heavier I know I’m happier that way. Plus there’s a whole shelf of jeans here going to waste.

Has anyone got any good (wheat free) tips for putting on weight? Preferably in the bum and boobs regions, but that’s probably just asking too much.

x

Is that the right way to spell ‘Ta Dah’?

^ ^That's me

Well here goes, the very first post on a brand new Blog. I feel as if I should be locked away in a room with no furniture and distractions, but experience tells me otherwise. Put your first post on a pedestal and it gets whipped away when you’re offline, so you never get back into that ‘perfect’ state of mind.

Right now I have what can only be described as a ‘WordPress headache’ from trying to work the frigging thing out, and I’ve got looming work I’m eager to get on with tomorrow morning. With regards to layout, it may be different in a month’s time, but for now I like the six-feet-under-ness of the banner and the lack of clutter.

I’m Lucy, I’m a freelance writer of online content (mainly news releases), in my early twenties, living with parents and in a long-distance relationship. I’m (not very secretly) incredibly broody all the time, often having stomach problems and stomach related anxiety. I love knitting, obsessed cats and go through cycles (with boyfriend) of watching one comedy drama DVD over and over and over again until we can recite the whole thing. DAAAAAMN!

I’m here to put some interest back into writing. Apart from on Twitter, I very rarely write to an audience in my own voice and writing news releases day in, day out can take the fun out of the whole exercise. I got the idea to start this from @mspennylane on Twitter, and her brilliantly brilliant blog Marmalade Skies, so thank you for the inspiration! Hopefully you’ll enjoy reading my posts, which I’ll try to diversify, bring other people into, along with videos, photos and some challenges I’ll set myself. I might need your help, though. All the others have kind of fallen by the wayside. One minute’s silence for CraftyBloggers and L Wallace Writing.

and with this wonderful display of bad grammar, I leave you with a LOLCat…